It is universally acknowledged that dogs come here to teach us unconditional love but what does that really mean and do we actually listen and then follow this through and act on it?
Three years ago one of my dogs, Susie, passed away. She was one of the best teachers of unconditional love that I have ever come across, she embodied it and magnified it beyond description. Her passing got me thinking a lot about what she and other animals have taught me, and still do, about this.
Your animal(s) and the animals you meet will be teaching you about unconditional love too. All animals show us unconditional love, some by example and some by mirroring us and some by challenging us.
So what is it and how do they teach us?
Loving Without Judgement
Judgement is putting a label with a meaning to someone/something or to a trait or part of someone/something. We see these traits as good or bad.
To love without judging is to see these parts, or the whole, and not put a label loaded with bias on them. It is to accept with compassion an equally ‘good’ or ‘bad’ trait or character. This is generally challenging for humans to do but dogs are experts at expanding our hearts to enable us to love without judgement.
One of my best teachers in this was Rufus, my people-aggressive dog. The less I judged him and the more I accepted him and saw how much he tried, the easier it was to feel complete and unconditional love for him. I loved him from the start but loving him whatever he did, however he reacted, became so much easier with his lessons in this and the practice I got with him. He opened my heart massively.
Practice focusing on understanding your animal’s choices and actions, recognising that they have their own journey and struggles. Stop judgemental thoughts as soon as you notice them and change them to love.
“Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy.” ~ Thomas Merton
Acceptance
Linked to non-judgment is acceptance. Embrace your animal for who they are, without trying to change them. This does not mean you cannot help them heal or improve but accept them as they are now with love, accept everything about them.
Acceptance is a cornerstone of unconditional love.
Recognise and appreciate their strengths and imperfections, understanding that they are not perfect.
Rufus also helped me with this, once I learned to accept him and how he was, so much strain left our relationship and we made much better progress and had an even better connection than before.
It is very much easier to move forward when you accept them for who they are.
Empathy
Empathy involves putting yourself in your animal’s shoes, acknowledging their emotions, and showing compassion. Seeking to understand their feelings and perspectives from their point of view and not ours.
Empathy fosters a deep connection and demonstrates that you care about their well-being.
All animals are masters of empathy, they pick up on our energy and feelings all the time and often are there just to support us, comfort us or show us by mirroring or communicating in the best way they can and we can do this with them too.
Connect with your heart to theirs and listen to what you receive from them. If you don’t feel or receive anything then relax and send them love, often this will enable you to receive feelings and information from them and if it doesn’t just know that your animal will feel it from you and it will strengthen your connection.
The more we connect with them from our heart the more we learn their feelings and state of being.
Forgiveness
Oh, how tough this one can be for us humans! Animals, however, are experts at this. Whatever we do to them, hopefully unintentionally, they always forgive us and love us if our intentions are kind. Always. Even abused or very fearful animals want to forgive and love, given the chance and the support.
Let go of resentment and forgive mistakes. Unconditional love involves recognising that everyone makes errors, and holding onto grudges can hinder the growth of a relationship.
It is equally important to forgive ourselves for our mistakes and actions as it is to forgive others for theirs.
Forgiveness allows for healing and moving forward.
Support
Be there for your animal in both good and challenging times. Offering your support without expecting anything in return is a powerful way to demonstrate unconditional love.
Provide encouragement, lend a listening ear, and be a reliable presence in their lives.
In my work helping sensitive, fearful animals listening is a key part of the process. Listening is empowering and healing and when done with love it brings the connection and healing to a new and higher level.
Self-Love
Lastly but by no means leastly!
Unconditional love is not complete without loving ourselves. This includes all of the above points about loving without judgement, acceptance, forgiveness, empathy and support. It is not selfish to love ourselves, on the contrary, it is very necessary for our health and well-being.
Susie was the queen for showing me to do this and how to do it. She mirrored my own inner beauty and reflected it back to me through her soft loving eyes.
Every time I show myself love, compassion and kindness it helps me on all levels.
Listen to your animal when she shows you this about yourself or does something to make you slow down and pay attention.
Practice, Practice, Practice!
Practicing these elements of unconditional love will lead to deeper, more meaningful connections with yourself, your animal and those around you. Your animal will breathe a sigh of relief and thank you.
“My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog already thinks I am.”
~ Anon
With unconditional love and kindness,
